My Son, Amari
Hi guys! I honestly can’t believe I’m writing this blog post, if you haven’t already watched my birth story click here
I took a month off for maternity leave and I heard babies were unpredictable but what I wasn’t prepared for was how unpredictable they really were. While I was pregnant, I used to complain that I wanted him to come asap so I could meet him, imagine my surprise when he decided to make an early debut. When he was first born, I knew my life would change but I didn’t know the magnitude.
Having a baby is not an easy thing and the first two weeks between learning how to breastfeed, being scared about everything and not sleeping much my life had already been turned around. Though almost a month and a half later things haven’t changed so much I’ve adapted to now having a little one around. At first, I wasn’t sure when I’d be coming back especially because most people take 3 months but I knew that I needed to come back to my outlet. My one thing I always talk about is a sense of self, when you first have a baby it’s almost like the baby is an extension of you in some form and you lose yourself in the process. I knew it was important to go back to doing what I loved as an avenue to not forget who I am and just bury myself in all things baby.
I’ve definitely changed, I’m not who I was before. I almost feel more grown in a way, well rounded. It seems weird but having a child that is my responsibility makes me feel more efficient, stronger and more passionate.
I had goals before but now I feel like those goals have become more magnified. Enough about me lets talk about Amari! Still can’t believe I have a son truly but hes the sweetest, most loving little boy. I felt his nature when he was inside my womb and now that he’s out he is exactly who I thought he’d be. Such a calm child, he has such intent in his eyes and I can’t wait for him to start talking. I kept thinking he was going to be a cancer boy just like his dad but he ended up being a gemini, which leads me to believe he dances to the beat of his own drum already. My sweet Amari, I’m so grateful for you, because of you I’m a mother and your dad is a father, we are changed forever.